I cockslap morals
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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