Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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