did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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