i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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