she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
