but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Randomize
