puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
