What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
