I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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