you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
