I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize