Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
