I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize