She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize