i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
