Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
