i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
