can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
