I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
