I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Randomize
