Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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