Just cropdusted the office
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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