Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He passed out mid-signature
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
