Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize