I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
