btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
