I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
