All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize