I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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