I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
