Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
