you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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