I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize