So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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