i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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