Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
