I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
