At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
