hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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