I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
