Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
