My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize