I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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