Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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