batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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