I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I need mimosas to revive my soul
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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