How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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