What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
