Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
