im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
