One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
