Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
