i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
be right there i have to get my cape
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
